I know what you’re thinking. The title of this post must be a typo, surely going to a Christian school is the best place for a Christian to be. Here are a few reasons as to why I think that going to a Christian school has been detrimental to my faith. (HINT: It was my fault and not the school’s).
The first thing that you as the reader need to know about me is that before I went to the Christian university that I am at now, I had always been attending public schools. In high school especially, I had to learn how to defend my faith. I had so many friends around and people that did not know Jesus. I had to be Jesus to my friends and peers through my actions and my words. This required me to be reading my Bible, talking in fellowship with other Christians, and praying constantly for the people that were around me. I had a passion, a fire if you will, for Christ. I was the strongest in my faith than I had ever been. I believe that this was due to my internal motivation, determination, and perseverance to learn and my yearning to be close to Christ. When major life events happened in high school, I knew how to cope with them. I knew that I had a small group of people that I could talk with who were also Christians going through the same things as me, who were also trying to navigate through life at the same pace as me. Biblical community was a big priority in my life.
When I first got to my university, I thought that it was going to be so nice to finally be in an environment where the majority of people had the same values and beliefs as me. And honestly, it was incredible! At first, the daily chapel opportunities, the residence Bible studies, the Bible classes, and university church on Friday nights were just what I needed. However, as time went on, my faith became placid. I struggled with the people that were so clearly hypocrites. I did not understand how people could go from worshiping God to dissing someone in a span of two minutes. After some time passed, I am quite sure that I became a hypocrite myself. All of the tools offered to strengthen our faith became the reasons that I stopped caring as much about learning and desiring to be close to God. Of course, there were still times where I very much needed and enjoyed the tools, but my faith was not at the level it had been in high school. Ironically, I had to work harder at a Christian university to maintain my relationship with Jesus than I had to while I was attending my public high school. Not everything has been bad. I love learning in the Bible courses about the Bible. I find that they really helped me to get more out of my Bible reading. I’m still trying to regain my faith and get over being in this dry spot.
Let me know if you have any experiences like mine. How did you overcome and regain your faith?
C’est la vie,